Venting!

I do not have friends. Mostly because I tend to stick to myself and I have a hard time trusting people enough to let them get to close to me. That being said when I do make friends with someone I will do just about anything for them. Is it unfair of me to expect the same in return?

When I had oral surgery my "friend" took me there and drove me home as well as drove me around to get my prescriptions filled. That was nice of her and I was very appreciative. She also volunteered to take care of my dog for a couple of days till I started to feel better. That did not happen. Instead when I told her where all of his stuff was and whatnot she decided that she would rather stop by once and a while to check on him. That would of been OK but she never showed up to check on him. Thankfully I was able to take care of him with no real problem but I was still a little upset. Now she is gone and she has a friend who is having some personal problems and I am dog sitting both of their dogs. Not just for a day but from last night (Tuesday) till Friday! Normally I would not mind but I am still going through some stuff having to do with the dentist as well as preparing myself to have surgery on my leg (maybe). Added to that one of the dogs is a five month old lab who has not been trained at all, does not even respond to her name. Nikki's dog and her friends dog have been going potty inside the house. Nikki's dog has only done it a couple of times but the lab has done it about 10 times so far, even as far as going potty on my couch AND my bed. Added to that she has worms and threw up three times, one of those times was all over the top of my bed, down the side of the bed and all over my dogs head!

On top of my medical problems, my feeling that David is taking me for granted (he avoids talking to me when he can, more on that in a minute) my family problems and now the problems with my leg I am stressed out to the max. I feel like I am at my boiling point and I don't know what to do about it.

Lately David has kind of been avoiding me. I know that he gets online and on Facebook but instead of talking to me he plays games, watches music videos on YouTube or whatever else it is that he does. I am trying to have faith in my husband but I feel like I am not important enough for him to think about and for him to want to talk to me when he is able. I know that I am lucky that I get to speak with him as often as I do but at the same time I cannot help but to be hurt when he is online and he knows I am awake but makes no effort to get a hold of me. I feel guilty for thinking this but sometimes I wonder who he is talking to behind my back. I try really really hard to have faith in him and trust him but he makes it hard to do so sometimes. I love my husband very much and I try to show him that by being there for him when he needs me. I wish he would show me that he loves me by being there for me as well.