On a side note - While we were in TN I was looking for a specific picture of David and I on Mom's computer, first I tried her new laptop and instead of finding pictures of David and I, I found pictures of him and his ex wife in different folders including the "to be copied" folder. I have to confess, my feelings were hurt. As silly as this sounds, I just wish that she would disappear from his and my life, I get tired of seeing her pictures instead of mine and I get tired of seeing her around on FB.
How do you describe yourself when you don't know yourself? I am Tracie. I am currently married to a man who has recently told me that he does not care if I am with him or not. I am married to a cheater and a liar. I am just another broken person, broken because of the carelessness of someone who was supposed to love me.
Monday, July 11, 2011
A lot of Pictures
Recently David came home for leave. His leave came at a very good time, I was in desperate need of a reminder of his love and he is not great at expressing that from far away. Anyway, here are some pictures of his visit.

On a side note - While we were in TN I was looking for a specific picture of David and I on Mom's computer, first I tried her new laptop and instead of finding pictures of David and I, I found pictures of him and his ex wife in different folders including the "to be copied" folder. I have to confess, my feelings were hurt. As silly as this sounds, I just wish that she would disappear from his and my life, I get tired of seeing her pictures instead of mine and I get tired of seeing her around on FB.
On a side note - While we were in TN I was looking for a specific picture of David and I on Mom's computer, first I tried her new laptop and instead of finding pictures of David and I, I found pictures of him and his ex wife in different folders including the "to be copied" folder. I have to confess, my feelings were hurt. As silly as this sounds, I just wish that she would disappear from his and my life, I get tired of seeing her pictures instead of mine and I get tired of seeing her around on FB.
Saturday, July 9, 2011
An e-mail to my husband.
David,
I have been sitting here thinking of you and I and I have so many feelings going through me right now that I don’t really know where to begin.
Here are some things that I have been thinking about:
We will fight, there will be times where we just want to walk away, throw our hands up and say “I give up!” We will make up, we will come back to each other, apologize and then move forward and grow together. We will get irritated at each other and just want some time alone, but once we have too much time alone we will want to be together more than anything else in the world. I will drive you up the wall with how jealous I get and how much I need your affection but I will also stand by you, support you, love you, encourage you and tell you how wonderful you truly are. We will never be as good apart as we are together. You are my world, my everything, the one person in my life who really understands me and loves me despite that. I will get mad at you, I will question you about other people, I will get jealous when you are not focused on just me, I will also apologize and try to understand, I will feel bad and try to make up to you. I will spoil you, dreadfully, but I will also make you happy if you would let me. I will always be there for you and will try to understand that sometimes when I am trying to be there for you that you just need to be alone. I will dance with you, play swords with you and make funny faces at you, just so you will smile. I will love you with every fiber of my being and be loyal to you and never stray from your side. I need to know that you will do that as well.
I love you David. More than I ever thought possible to love another person. For me, you are perfect. I know I am a headache sometimes, but I am pretty awesome as well. Please love me and please be happy with me because you make me so very happy David.
Love for eternity,
Your Wife
Tracie
(sent on June 5th - He never responded)
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